Archive | Ponderings

Lessons Learned

  1. The first pancake always turns out badly.
  2. You don’t have to get along with everyone, or make everyone like you.
  3. Love makes you stupid.
  4. You always have at least 2 choices, even if you don’t like your choices.
  5. Sometimes even women need to learn to man up.
  6. Most people operate out of selfish motivations.
  7. It’s rarely about you.
  8. Soda is evil.
  9. It’s okay to break the rules, as long as you are good enough not to get caught, and you aren’t hurting anyone.
  10. “Be kinder than necessary ’cause everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.”
  11. There’s three sides to every story- his, hers, and the truth.
  12. Time doesn’t heal anything- it’s what you do with that time.
  13. Complaining and blaming other people doesn’t help anything, and makes you miserable company.
  14. Everything in your life is your responsibility.
  15. You train people how to treat you.
  16. There’s always hope.
  17. You can always be grateful for something.
  18. If you aren’t making mistakes, you aren’t trying hard enough.
  19. You never really become an adult. You just get more responsibility, and become wiser.
  20. Showing emotion is not a sign of weakness. Knowing when it is appropriate is a skill.
  21. Google can answer anything.
  22. Being silly is one of my favorite qualities in a person.
  23. Honesty is always the easiest route. Even if it’s not in the short term.
  24. You should never stop learning, or trying to be a better person.
  25. Worrying is useless, unless it motivates you to take action.
  26. When people show you who they are, believe them.
  27. There is only fear, and love. And one of them is way more fun.
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H2O: Dangerous Chemical!

A student at Eagle Rock Junior High won first prize at the Greater Idaho Falls Science Fair, April 26. He was attempting to show how conditioned we have become to alarmists practicing junk science and spreading fear of everything in our environment. In his project he urged people to sign a petition demanding strict control or total elimination of the chemical “dihydrogen monoxide.”

And for plenty of good reasons, since:

  • it can cause excessive sweating and vomiting
  • it is a major component in acid rain
  • it can cause severe burns in its gaseous state
  • accidental inhalation can kill you
  • it contributes to erosion
  • it decreases effectiveness of automobile brakes
  • it has been found in tumors of terminal cancer patients
  • He asked 50 people if they supported a ban of the chemical.

Forty-three (43) said yes, six (6) were undecided, and only one (1) knew that the chemical was water.

The title of his prize winning project was, “How Gullible Are We?”

He feels the conclusion is obvious.

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Truths

  1. Nothing sucks more than the moment during an argument when you realize you’re wrong.
  2. I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger. Actually made up for it a lot in my later years of education.
  3. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet? Maybe its just a guy thing though.
  4. Was learning cursive really necessary? Only time I kinda use it is my signature, but its more “chicken scratch” than signature according to my friends.
  5. Online maps really need have an option to start their directions at #5… I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
  6. I can’t remember the last time I was not at least a little tired.
  7. Bad decisions make good stories (and good photos/videos).
  8. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren’t going to do anything productive for the rest of the day. I’ve noticed this becomes progressively earlier at the beginning and end of the work week though.
  9. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don’t want to have to restart my collection… again. Hopefully digital will become viably legal though and we can ditch disks all together though!
  10. I’m always slightly terrified when I exit out of a program and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my document that I swear I did not make any changes to. Sometimes I want to save just in case but then I worry I’ve deleted something perfectly good!
  11. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring, but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn’t answer? Drop the phone and run away? Or got so mad that you dared to miss their call they are ignoring you now?
  12. I hate leaving my house feeling confident and good looking and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
  13. I keep some people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call. Sometimes its fun to come up with creative new names for these callers.
  14. I think the freezer deserves a light as well (I know that some do now… but my old one did not… poor guy)
  15. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would argue that more kisses begin with alcohol than with jewelry.
  16. I wish Google Maps had an avoid ghetto routing option, otherwise known as the “please don’t shoot me” route.
  17. Sometimes, I’ll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it. I think I was probably too naive to grasp the more subtle plot elements.
  18. I would rather try to carry 10 overloaded plastic bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
  19. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to do something on my phone (or makeup for girls).
  20. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
  21. How many times is it appropriate to say “what?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said? I think 3 is a good choice.
  22. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in line at the front. Stay strong people!
  23. Shirts get dirty, underwear gets dirty. Pants? Not so much. This is why in college my (#underwear)=(#pants)*(20).
  24. Is it me or do high school kids keep on getting dumber and dumber every year? Also smaller and smaller.
  25. There is no worse feeling than that millisecond you’re sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
  26. As a driver I dislike pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I dislike drivers, but in both modes of travel I dislike bicyclists.
  27. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is (or I guess my smartphone now since I keep on loosing/destroying/forgetting my watches).
  28. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and pinning the tail on my donkey. But I’ll bet that almost anybody can find and push their snooze button from 3 feet away in about 2 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time 😛

If you liked this post, see Truths 2

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Best of Clients from Hell

I’ve been enjoying the great stories over at Clients from Hell, and thought I would share some of my favorites here.

Me: “Now just clear the cache memory in your browser in order to see latest changes we made to your website.”
Client: “What browser?”
Me: “Well, you probably use Mozilla Firefox or Internet Explorer to access the internet.”
Client: “No, no, you’re mistaken. We go directly to internet.”

Website user who couldn’t find an article emailed our help desk. We sent him the link to the content he couldn’t find.
Client: “Please change the letters in your email to blue, so I can click the link.”

Me: “Unfortunately some of the images you sent over cant be used as they are the wrong file type.”
Client: “Oh, okay. Which files?”
Me: “The animated GIFs.”
Client: “So why can’t they be used for the brochure?”

Client: “Why is the text slanty?”
Me: “It is in italics.”
Client: “No, it is slanty.”
Me: “It’s called italics.”
Client: “I don’t care what you call it, make it stop.”

“I want to build a website that appeals to the Amish people.”

Client: ”So they say that art is a passion. Do you really think that it’s right to charge someone for something you’re passionate about?”

“We’ve identified our target audiences. They’re 50% female and 42% male.”

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All ducks wear dog masks…

This pretty much blew my mind! Well, not really, but its pretty dang cool and I’m totally going to look for this in all ducks now.

The doggie masks are so cute! Some angles make it look more wolfish though.

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Most Popular Internet Activities

My personal top internet time consumers are electronic communication, GOOGLE 🙂 search and everything else, web media (news, video, music).

I am going to try to incorporate as many of these as I can into a personal blog/homepage as I can. Right now on my website I have personal stuff (resume, art, etc..), random blog posts, media (video, fav wallpapers), recipes, and entertainment (games, gadgets). Do you guys have any ideas of things I could incorporate into my site?

Activity Percent_of_Internet_users
who report this activity
Send or read email 92%
Use a search engine to find information 89
Search for a map or driving directions 86
Look for info on a hobby or interest 83
Research a product or service before buying 81
Check the weather 80
Look for health/medical info 75
Get travel info 73
Get news 73
Buy a product 71
Visit a local, state, or federal government website 66
Buy or make a reservation for travel 64
Surf the Web for fun 62
Go to a website that provides info or support for a specific medical condition or personal situation 58
Research for school or training 57
Watch a video clip or listen to an audio clip 56
Look for “how-to,” “do-it-yourself,” or repair information 55
Look online for news or information about politics or the upcoming campaigns 55
Look up phone number or address 54
Do any banking online 53
Watch a video on a video-sharing site like YouTube or GoogleVideo 52
Take a virtual tour of a location online 51
Do any type of research for your job 51
Look online for info about a job 47
Get sports scores and info online 45
Get info online about a college, university, or other school you or a family member might attend 45
Download other files such as games, videos, or pictures 42
Get financial info online, such as stock quotes or mortage interest rates 41
Send instant messages 40
Look for info about a place to live 39
Download computer programs from the Internet 39
Pay bills online 38
Download music files to your computer 37
Upload photos to a website so you can share them with others online 37
Look for information on Wikipedia 36
Send or receive text messages using a cell phone 35
Look for religious/spiritual info 35
Play online games 35
Listen to music online at a website 34
Read someone else’s online journal, web log, or blog 33
Rate a product, service, or person using an online rating system 32
Use online classified ads or sites like Craig’s list 32
Log on to the internet using a wireless device 30
Listen to a live or recorded radio broadcast online, such as a newscast, sporting event, or radio show 29
Categorize or tag online content like a photo, news story, or blog post 28
Search for info about someone you know or might meet 28
Pay to access or download digital content online 28
Share files from own computer with others 27
Download video files to your computer 27
Participate in an online auction 26
Research your family’s history or genealogy online 25
Download screensavers from the Internet 23
Chat in a chat room or in an online discussion 22
Download computer games from the Internet 21
Create content for the Internet 19
Download a podcast so you can listen to it or view it at a later time 19
Make a donation to a charity online 18
View live images online of a remote location or person, using a webcam 17
Use an online social networking sites like MySpace, Facebook, or Friendster 16
Sell something online 15
Take a class online just for personal enjoyment or enrichment 13
Participate in an online discussion, a listserv, or other online group that helps people with personal issues or health problems 12
Send or receive an invitation to a meeting or party using an online invitation service 12
Take a class online for credit toward a degree of some kind 12
Create or work on your own online journal or blog 12
Take material you find online—like songs, text, or images—and remix it into your own artistic creation 11
Buy or sell stocks, bonds, or mutual funds 11
Make a phone call online 8
Go to a dating website or other site where you can meet people online 6
Create an avatar or online representation of yourself 6
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Anagrams!

I have no clue how I ended up here, but I found this awesome site where you can type in any word and it will generate anagrams for it, awesome, eh? I typed in my name of course and I got interesting things like Heavens Line, or Inhale Seven or Inhales Even, etc… There are also strange ones that I think I might use when Diablo III comes out such as Vale Shine En.

Despite the endless appleal of typing in random names and such into the anagram generator, the best part of the site was the hall of fame. This has some of the best anagrams ever! Such as:

Dormitory = Dirty Room

Schoolmaster = The classroom

Elvis = Lives

Listen = Silent

Clint Eastwood = Old West Action

Madam Curie = Radium came

The eyes = They see

The Morse Code = Here Come Dots

Butterfly = Flutter-by

Funeral = Real Fun

The Railroad Train = Hi! I Rattle and Roar

The United States of America = Attaineth its cause, freedom

The Public Art Galleries = Large Picture Halls, I Bet

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